A Rare Mood.

So I set my alarms for 5:45am and such so that I could be at 67th and Columbus by 6:30am to get on the standby line for a 9am taping of Regis and Kelly Live. I went in my bed around midnight and woke up at 1 WIDE AWAKE. So I hung out with my friend Tony, drank some tea, watched some TV and hit the sack at 4 for a little nap. When 5:45  rolled around, I was pissed and unplugged my alarm and turned off my phone alarms. Next thing I know I hear my text message ringer going off and it's from Jessica "Hey I'm here, are you coming?" I look at the clock and it's 7:31am.

Fuck. My. Life.

So I throw on anything I can find and sprint in the drizzle to the subway. I get to the Columbus Circle stop (on 59th street) and get another text from her. "Hey, doors close at 8:15. Are you gonna make it?" Ohh by the way... it's 8:12 and I'm on 60th street. I jump in a cab and get stuck in traffic. I get there at 8:20 and the dude gives me a standby thing that doesn't guarentee admission. Turns out my biddie friend had talked to someone outside who had an extra ticket so she got inside. BID.

While I was waiting to find out if I got in I noticed some of Jason's roadies hanging outside. One is a Rod Stewart wannabe (Named ET, I think) and another, named Jarrod who I had met at the Radio City show and is my friend on facebook. I didn't want to risk not getting in by saying hi to the one I know so I just watched them hang out and go back inside. I hung around until 9, when finally some bitch came out and was like "Umm, yeah, you guys aren't getting in. But you're more then welcome to stay for the 10am taping of some other bullshit." OHH HELL NO! I was pissed.

So I dicked around at Starbucks and smoked and all that and watched the show from the window... In the drizzle. Finally the show ended and me and Jessica had planned to stick around afterwards and catch him at the door. Too bad they basically kept the audience hostage and wouldn't let them out unitl they taped like 500 different things. She said the show actualy sucked and she would have rather been outside with me. 'Cause I'm that awesome, I know.

So I started hanging out with the paparazzi, the collecters, and some dude from TMZ. I showed them my picture and they loved it, they called me Jason's biggest fan and let me stand in front of them when he came out...

So then the TMZ guy is like why should I care bout this guy I don't know him. And I was like well He's awesome. Then it hit me... And I said You know he was just nominated for three Grammys right? And the guy flips out and gives me a give five and is like THANK YOU FOR THE RELEVANT INFORMATION! and he ended up giving me his card because he said I was super cool. Then the stage door opened and I see Jarrod so i stare at him for ten seconds and finally i shout out his name and He's like yeah? And i was like It's dana. And he comes over and is like holy shit! Look at you! And gives me a hug and then tugs on my hood and says i didn't recognize you with this hood and i was like well It's raining. And he goes yeah i know i don't wanna get my camera yet come here. And the stage door was like this huge garage door and there's a little room that it leads to. So he lets me hang ou in the little room and we tak about all kinds off bullshit. Then Jason's manager comes out and is like listen, jason is late. We're going to play at a children's hospital and we're trying to finish up taping but then we're leaving he won't sign anything or anything, I'm not trying to be rude i'm just telling you what's going on. Then they kicked me back into the rain but was very nice about the whole thing so i wasn't so pissed. Ten minutes later the door opens again in all his people are in the little room. Jarrod came out and was talking to me when et was like LET'S GO! so he goes alright i guess i gotta in sit in the back seat, i guess i'll see you next time we're in ny. And have of another hug and peaced. Then his bongo man came out and i was the only one who knew who he was and was like HI TOCA! and he said hi and left. This whole time i should've been snapping pictures in all their faces but was too worried about trying to get another polaroid that i failed cause jason was looking HOT! So when jason came out i asked for a polaroid and he turns around and is like I'o so sorry i'd love to but we really gotta Leave. Next time i promise. And got into the car and they left. That fix was such a fail but tuesday was good. Damn that's a long ass story.

So me and a girl I met at the Radio City show (Name: Jessica Mayfair...) knew he'd be at PLJ on Tuesday, we didn't know where or when but we were determined to figure it out... So I had a number and an address that I planned on getting in touch with them but she beat me to it...

So she texts me and is like OMG I know what time it's at. Thank god you found that number! So I start shitting because we actually have a chance of stalking him outside of the studio... A half hour later she texts me again going HOLY FUCKING SHIT WE GOT TICKETS and I'm getting you in GUARANTEED! and I'm like holy dick what the hell happened in the last 30 minutes...

So she calls me that night saying she called the station and was like "Hi, my name is MJ Leeder (Ficticious character) and I won tickets on Friday to Jason Mraz's acoustic performance tomorrow and I haven't heard anything about where or when it is and I'm getting nervous 'cause it's tomorrow. I called a different number and they gave me this number and told met that you would help me out with it." So the lady on the phone is like "Well I don't see your name on the list but since you won recently, it just probably isn't in the system, anyway it's at 2 Penn Plaza, above MSG at 1pm but get there around 12:15." So Jessica is like "Well okay thanks but how am I going to get in if my name's not there? I'm nervous." So the lady asks her her name again and she says "MJ Leeder but my cousin, Jessica Mayfair actually made the call so maybe it's in her name" So the lady responds "Okay well I don't see the names but I'll call you back" That's when I got the first text...

The lady calls her back and is like "Okay well the names aren't in the computer but I put you on the guest list, see you tomorrow." Way to be a scam artist Jessica!!!

The next afternoon I show up and call her to find her, she tells me she's in the lobby of 2 Penn Plaza, I walk in and she immediately pulls me aside and says "Listen, you're MJ Leeder and you're 16 so you don't have an id. I gave them my real name and showed them my id so I'm all set and the guest list says Jessica Mayfair + 1 guest, so they probalby won't ask you for it anyway" So I get a name tag that says MJ Leeder and I'm walking around with it on like such a dick. Lovin' it.

So we go upstairs and are put into this tiny room with a bunch of 40 fails who actually won the contest. We're given a little piece of paper to download the pictures we would soon be taking with the man himself. And a large index card to write any questions we might have for him. I failed and didn't ask a question because hey, if I wanna ask a question I'm going to ask him myself to his face. Zing.

Finally we get to go inside and we're in the 3rd of about 10 rows right on the end. I had brought my picture of me kissing him with me and everyone who saw it went crazy for it, they loved it. So he plays his little tunes, answers his little questions and makes his little jokes and busts out. We're told he's going to freshen up and then we'll take our pictures. So we leave the room to get online (which ended up being the front of the line and no one told us - SUPERWIN!) And I start looking for my picture.

And I can't find it... FAIL I'm squatting at the door with my asscrack hanging out, sexy I know, and I hear a voice behind me. I see Jason standing right behind me and I'm like "Wow, I'm in the perfect BJ position, sweet." So after searching and asking if anyone had seen my picture lying around, it was still missing.

So they call the first four in for the picture (such a fail, why not 1 or 2... 4? LAME!) So I run over to him with my polaroid in my hands (btw- he's OBSESSED with polaroids and ever since the 8th grade I've always wanted one of him & I) and he looks over and the conversation goes a little something like this...

JMraz: Ohh a Polaroid!
DMolloy: Of course *under my breath* Can I take a quick one with you?

CameraNazi: NO NO NO NO NO! OUR CAMERA ONLY! NO NO NO!!!!!
JMraz: *looks at CameraNazi like "Who the FUCK are you?", grabs the camera out of my hands, turns around* What if we just go over here and do it like this?!? *Snaps picture in our faces*
DMolloy: Thanks Jason.

Then I cozy up next to him for the CameraNazi's picture and forget to drop of my shit on the side so it's in the picture 'cause I'm a dick and failed. He's such a little stringbean, I could wrap my arms around him 3 times, litterally. So then he puts his arm around me and leans his head over to me and his little hat tassle was in my face. (See Picture)

After our picture was taken, I stayed near him and this conversation went like this...

DMolloy: Jason! I had a picture of me kissing you at the Highline show in April, but get this, I just LOST it!!!
JMraz: Ahh shit, that sucks! I'm sorry. *looks dow at me ever so seductively* But you still have the memory riiiiiiight?
DMolloy: *failing at being seductive* Ohh, of course.
JMraz: Well that's all that matters then.
DMolloy: Well, could I maybe have another?
JMraz: Ohh, definitely. *leans down and kisses me on the cheek*
DMolloy: Thanks, Jason.
JMraz: No problem. blah blah blah

So we go over and eat all of PLJ's free pizza and drink all of thier soda with someone from Jason's manegment company, Larry, because Jessica wanted her book signed and Jason told us to go hang out with him. During all this I found my picture, so once all the other groups of 4 took their pictures we walked back over to Jason with Larry. Granted, I wasn't suppossed to be there but now that I found my picture I was going back. So Jess was talking to him and saying all these fail things about how she wrote him a letter way back when and he totally didn't remember it, but he felt really bad... So then I busted back over to him and was like "LOOK! I FOUND IT!" and he goes "Well look at that. There you go. There we are. Awesome." and then Larry escorted him out like he was Britney Spears or something.

We were on cloud nine, we hung out afterwards with some other legit fans who were pretty awesome and then got the hell outta there. By the time we were talking to Jason, I was no longer MJ. I got in and got what I wanted so I didn't care anymore if they tried to kick me out. Ohh and I stole one of their pens we were supposed to give back too...

Then we made plans to go to Regis and Kelly the next day...

I'm with Jess and Tony in Bobst Library, all of us there for various reasons. From the corner of my eye I see a lighter haired, very nicely dressed S. He flashes me a wink and waves me over. I break away from Jess and Tony telling them I have to go. I run up to him and immediately want to kiss him. Our meeting in awkward. We go for a hug and fail and after a little mindless chitchat we do embrace adn we hold it. He leans against the wall and holds me close to him. My legs are perfectly intertwined between him. We fit together perfectly, just like we once did. we start talking, I say his name and he corrects me in a whisper. "It's Monty now hun." and then flashes me another wink and a smirk. I'm a sucker for winks. Damn. I suddenly feel myself against him and how good it feels and how every emotion of what we once were is flowing back to me at this exact moment. I remember the time we had sex, feeling him pressed against me. Making the deepest connection two humans could possibly make. We're relatively cool but my veins are flowing with electricity.

"Give me a hug" I ask. He replies with "What if I give you a smooch?" I think of how badly I want it. Ohh so badly. But I can't, not this soon, it's not right. I haven't seen him in three months and haven't really spoken to him in almost a year. But how nice it would be to feel his cool lips against mine, twisting, turning, an act that would surely send the present current in my body shooting outward. But my wish won't be accomplished now. He now reaches into his pocket to take out his phone. "I gotta take this" he says appolligetically. I'm reluctant to let him go but I stand upright because I fear of getting to close too quickly.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Jess and Tony. I don't think they saw our little exchange, and I hope for my sake they haven't. He returns on his phone, speaking in Spanish and then quickly closing his phone. "This isn't a good time now. I have a lot of calls to make." I look up at him trying to understand. He explains that the reason he's in NY is to study marketing at NYU. But for some reason I still don't understand he can't enroll using his real name, that's why he's "Monty" now, and that explains the completely altered appearance. We exchange a quick goodbye and plan to meet again soon. I look back at Jess and Tony once he's gone and decide that I should really go and do what I came to the library for.

I go into the room  that I need to work in and "Monty" is there again. He's on the phone again asking for Mike. I hear his voice next to me and I also hear it coming from the phone receiver in the hand of the man behind the desk. Does he realize that he's in the same room and the person on the other end? He's trying to get something from this Mike. I recognize the name and realize he's pronouncing it wrong, but I can't correct him because whatever he's doing here at NYU and with this Mike is some shady business. Certainly something I don't want to be caught up in. And besides if I go over to him and correct him the man behind the desk will know he's right there. The assistant to the man behind the desk corrects the pronunciation and says that Mike isn't here today or something like that. Then he looks over at "Monty" and hears the same thing I do. His voice projecting from two different points; his mouth and the receiver. He makes eye contact with "Monty" and "Monty" is quick to flee.

Before I leave the room I go searching through my bag. It was uncomfortable on my back and it needed to be repacked. I decide to do this while holding a cigarette in my hand. The cigarette soon drops and I immediately fear that it's fallen in my bag and all my belongings will go up in flames. A large man standing near me, with only a garbage can between us, finds my half-lit cigarette on the floor and picks it up. As he picks it up he says, "Here, I'll help you salvage some of it." I look at the cigarette and there is nearly nothing left of it so I push it out on the garbage can and throw it away.


I'm not at a family party in my backyard. We're all running around and laughing and having a good time. We begin to walk a lot, around the entire Interlaken property and I soon trip near the laundry room, but regain my step and follow everyone through the paths. I walk away from the party and arrive at Jess' new apartment, full of animals. Her zebra pony named Andy is very friendly and very small. For some reason I want to ride him and although I would never attempt it, I run the joke by Jess and she yells at me. "You can't DO THAT!!!!" I tell her to chill, for I was just joking. I wouldn't hurt her pony.


To be continued... I promise.

I totally forgot to write about two of the most epic days of my life, and two that win for Best Supporting Role....

March 24... March 26... March 27... & April 14 all in the year 2008.

March 24
Mike Rowe is scheduled to be at Good Morning America in Times Square. So me and Dario took an adventure. We got there at around 6:30 am and we were about to go into the studio for standby tickets until I saw two ladies creeping outside the side door and said "Wow, they must be from the message boards." I started talking to them and they we're all such a trip! We stood outside for awhile and we asked one of the ABC guys if they knew if Mike had arrived yet. He called up to the studio and they said that he wasn't there yet. Woot! So we waited by the door and after a little more wind and cold, a black car drove up and no other than Mike Rowe stepped out. (The next few minutes are a blur because I was just trying to grasp the idea of what was actually happening.) I don't think I've ever thrown away a cigarette so fast in my life than at  that exact moment because I basically shat myself. So he came over to us and started talking to us like an old friend. And when he shook all our hands he asked us our real names and our names on the MB. Of course I mad an ass out of myself because this is how the convo went.

Mike: Hi.
Dana: Hi, I'm Dana.
Mike: Dana what?
Dana: *insert last name here*
Mike: Are you on the MB
Dana: *d'oh!* Ohh yeah, I'm daynes, I haven't been there long, you probably don't know me.
Mike: Yeah, no.

Kudos for me!

Then these randoms showed up and they had a quick chat with him...
Guy: "Here use my back!"
Mike: "I asked for your back, not your butt... It's not that kind of show!"

Mike stayed outside for us for a while and was everything I expected him to be-- and more. He said he hadn't been home in over 3 weeks (poor guy) and looked like he wanted a nap. (Heck, I think we all did.) Turns out after his segment he came back outside and talked to the peeps for a little more, but I had to go because I had to thaw out my feet. I had picked out my outfit that Saturday when it was kinda warm so I just figured it would be nice that Monday at the ass crack of dawn - WRONG!  FAIL! I know this has probably been said over a hundered and a half times before but I have o say it for myself, because I finally got to meet him! Mike is just as funny and down to earth as he is on DJ. He's very approachable and very calm, not to mention sweet as h3ll! He's the guy you'd take home to your mom and she'd love him. He's simply the best... end of story.

Pichaaaas-
Me & Mike... YAY!

Me: Can I ask you for one more favor?
Mike: Sure.
Me: Can I give you a kiss on the cheek?
Mike: *points to cheeks on his face* You mean these cheeks right?

Ohhh and he remembered my name. He signed my DVD and just wrote Mike Rowe then he looks down at me and goes "It's Dana right" and I told him yes and then he proceeded to spell it out loud and add "Keep It Dirty" under his signature... Love him.


March 26
I effing met Gene Wilder aka Willy Wonka and every other fantastic character ever. He was signing his new book at Barnes and Noble up on 5th Ave in Midtown. *hearts for Gene* When I waltzed up to him I couldn't think of anything to say, honestly... What could you say to Gene Wilder, the man is amazing. So right before I left I asked him if I could shake his hand, he placed his soft old man left hand in my right one and gave it a firm grandpa squeeze. I died right there on the spot. God, he's adorable.

March 27
I met Alton Brown at the same B&N uptown. He was amazing, he had a little conversation with me and signed his book. B&N has a policy of no posed photos so I got shat on with that, but I snapped a few candids of the two men. I was really tempted to ask Alton Brown to write "Stay Curious" in my book, cause you know he's Doug Weisman's famous twin! Haha. Next time- next time for sure.

April 14
The day I waited five years for. I met Jason Mraz. The one and only. And I fucking kissed him on the cheek. How did it happen you ask? Ohh I'll tell you. Short story is that me and DJ went out for a cigarette and started contemplating whether or not we should leave and give up or creep around. So we go to talking with a guy who worked there and we schmoozed it up... "I've been a fan for yearsssss!" "I would loooove a picture with him" "I would looooove to meet him!" and he goes "Hang on..." Turns around, whips two VIP passes outta his pocket, signs them and sends us back in. So we get told to go to the upstairs bar at Highline and there he is in all his glory with the whole band and all these randoms. He waltzed up to us and started talking to us. He held my leg up as he signed my pass and let me kiss him (Twice, just like Mike Rowe, the picture didn't take the first time so I got a second one with both of them!). Then I rubbed butts with him like 50 times and couldn't stop starring at him. As we left I grabbed his arm and was like "Thanks for everything Jason, great show" He threw us a peace sign and said some stuff and we bounced. We walked home from Highline and didn't speak to each other. It was the first time I've ever been star struck, except for maybe Mr. Wilder. God I love it. I still can't believe it. He was awesome.

So now I just have to meet Roger Bart and my life will be complete. I thought I had nothing to live for after meeting Jason and then I found RB. God, living in New York is amazing. I could never do this bullshit when in Westchester, I always have to catch a damn train... Not anymore, baby. Honestly when else would I be able just to get up and out and go sit front row center at a Broadway play because I had nothing to do that night. LOVE IT!

I think I ought to start packing and stop slacking. I'll be back with some creative pieces I wrote and need to get in an electronic form.

Peace & Love.

So I thought it might be appropriate it to post today seeing as I haven't in a century and a half and I'm procrastinating.

But I find myself short on words today. This muggy dreadful day that I've spent it being half hung-over from last night's festivities.

I was told that there are 8 different entrances to the Hilton Theater (where Young Frankenstein plays) on 42nd street and Roger Bart uses all of them to escape. So do you know what that means? That I'll probably never meet him. Dammit. That pisses me off. He's so good in YF and I can't wait to see that show about 400 more times. There has to be at least ONE night that he'll use the regular stage door, I mean he can't just crap on all the show-goers every night of his life. Please Roger, come out the damn door!!!

I'm sorry but in the words of Annamaria... Who does Roger Bart think he is?!?. After all, yeah he's a big name on Broadway and is pretty famous but Megan Mullalley is the biggest name in that show, everyone knows her and she gets a crazy response when she first appears on stage. People know her, they recognize her from all over, and hell I've freaking met her twice now. But no Roger. Not cool Roger. Not cool at all.

Keep an eye out for me Roger, I'll have a sign next time. Ohh and I'll be in the front row again, be sure to flash me a smile again! ;)

...

something will go here eventually...

...

    So apparently I'm dating Anthony Bourdain. You know cause my status was "Dana can not decide if Anthony Bourdain is hot or not..." So Jane  said "Jane loves Dana's new boyfriend Tony B." So Veton the Lizard thought that he was actually my boyfriend. Haha too much.

    So I don't know what's going on but I'm getting severely obsessed with Mike Rowe. It's probably because I haven't been able to be obsessed with a certain other older man. I've been having a lot of dreams in general but now they all seem to star Mr. Rowe. Last night was a very nice one. I guess we were acting students of some sort and we had to act intimate without actually doing anything. So he ran his hands through my hair and said all kinds of charming and somewhat sexual things to me and it was really intense. Then it was my turn and I didn't know what the hell to do because I'm no good at being romantic. So I just touched his face and hair awkwardly. Wow I'm cool.

    I really hope he come to NY so I can meet him and then I can stop stalking the message boards and can just calm down. I don't want to be a crazy, and don't want to be normal, just not obsessive. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

My flowers are dead and someone's being a dick. Way to walk off the face of the Earth after changing my entire life. I was giddy until I wrote that sentence. NOW I'M PISSED! Ughh. Suck it bitch, and go to hell.

Cheers!

Four boxes of Kashi Go Lean... $10 at Stop & Shop.
Lunch for three at Lou's Luncheonette... $20.15 courtesy of Mary Ellen.

Listening to Damien Rice's "Volcano" and realizing that it pertains to more than one relationship in your life... Priceless.

Goddamn. I can't even deal when a song almost breaks me apart because of it's significant meaning to one part of my life, but two? You've got to be shitting me. God. Whatever, got to let it all go. "Think about what you're doing not how. What not how. What not how." -Mike Rowe. So because nothing eventful happens in my life (nothing I'm about to share here at least) I went through the writer's block bullshit and picked out a bunch of interesting questions I intend on answering in this (and probably other,) posts. God speed.

When was the last time you surprised yourself?
Last night. At the Tony Dungy lecture, (which btw was pretty good. You know he signed my DVD and all.) But what surprised me about myself was that I actually dragged my fat-ass out of my chair to go up to the microphone to ask a question. Of course it was a retarded question ("Hi, so umm what are your feelings on the new stadium?" What a dick.) But I did it. I grew some cajones from my "X" chromosome and went for it. I made eye contact and he acknowledged me. Even when he signed my DVD he looked up at me and starred me straight in the eye. Almost made my knees weak. Now I'm not sexually attracted to him but to have someone like Tony Dungy look up at you and flash you a smile and say your name out loud as he signs your shit is a pretty intense experience. Especially because I just stood there knowing that he knows Peyton Manning on a personal level. He sees him every day. They share a common work place. They've touched. Tony knows his secrets, like how he listens to Kenny Chesney all the time and gets made fun of when he plays it.

Tony S.: So uhh Mr. Dungy can you tell me a piece of information about Peyton Manning?
Tony D.: Peyton Manning prefers Wine Coolers.

What did you dream about last night?
I dreamed that Mike Rowe was a family friend or something and my entire family and some friends all went out to dinner with him at what was a really happening Chinese food restaurant (I think it was the one that we used to eat at in Yonkers when my Oma & Opa used to live there) I was in my dorm and apparently that year I was rooming with Amanda DiBicarri, some other girl that apparently went to EHS that was Amanda's friend and Shana Oppenheim. (Now that I think about it I think that girl that I met outside of UHall today that was wearing the Lake Isle sweatshirt was the fourth roommate... odd.) So I went back to my room to get ready for the dinner date. Then we were all at dinner and we were allowed to leave while the food cooked so me and my new best family friend, Mike Rowe, went to the store that was a mix of a crap store you'd find at South of The Border and a thrift store. We walked around and I thought that it would be my perfect opportunity to ask Mike for a picture. I threw my camera at Roze and she failed to take a picture because she was too distracted by something else. So I asked Jane to do it. Mike and I were posing our asses off and we thought we saw a flash but when I checked my camera, the last picture was of Tony Dungy. All that time with Mike Rowe and no picture to show for it. WTF. So he sat next to me at dinner and was drinking a Budweiser and I really wanted it. So I took it and asked what kind it was and he told me but I just took it to my lips anyway like a bitch. But when it was at my mouth I couldn't bring myself to actually sip it and swallow it, so I just let it sit at my lips and then set it back down on the table. He didn't seem to mind but I felt like a dick anyway. (at this part of the dream I became semi-conscious and felt my flannel sheets on my arms and realized it was a dream, got pissed and fell right back into it... amazing, something that's never happened to me before.) So we ate some dinner, well everyone else ate except me because all the noodle dishes looked like they were those gross microwave Chinese meals and I was not about to eat it, but everyone else, especially Mike Rowe seemed to enjoy it. After finishing we went to a really crappy zoo. You didn't have to pay to get in but a donation was accepted. I immediately ditched Mike for some reason and went to the sea tank. There were about 1,000 really small like prematurely born manatees swimming around, some were even out of the tank and basically walking around. I remember being really frightened of them and telling them that they had to go back in their tank. They were really freaking me out. To make matters worse, three big dogs came up the stairs of where I was standing and this big German Shepard / Rottweiler / Doberman mix came up to me and began sucking and nibbling on my hand, it was a strange sensation and I really disliked it, but I was afraid that if I took my hand away from him he would attack me, and I didn't want that. Soon after I woke up and walked out into the living room, got really pissed off because I then realized again that it had all been a dream. Boy, was I pissed.

I've been dreaming a lot lately, probably because I've been switching beds a lot lately (from school to home...) and haven't been sleeping much so the sleep I actually do get is probably mostly REM sleep. The dream stage. Thanks ASR.

What inspires you to create?
I'm not sure, because I don't really create things in the traditional sense. I write, so I guess that's creative, especially because I love to write stories and all that bullshit. But what inspires me? Things I see, places I go, situations I encounter, people I meet and are forced to associate with.

What's one thing you struggle to describe?
One thing? Well I often have a hard time describing my dreams. They're usually very long and complicated with a lot of dialog and details, so I often lose people while in the midst of telling them my most epic dreams (Which is all of them. I love them all like I'd love my children. And even when I have nightmares in the traditional sense, I don't count them as nightmares, I explain them as dreams even if I woke up from them because they were so damn scary -- Think Disney Haunted Mansion falling off a fountain one...) I also find myself having to describe things in physical terms to people and failing, especially if they don't have the basis already built for them. I know I'll be okay once I start teaching because I will be building their base knowledge so when I try to explain other things, they'll know the other bullshit to understand the new stuff. I explained the lunar eclipse pretty well to Tina today. I took three clusters of Kashi and positioned them in the relative positions of our Earth, Sun and Moon and I showed her how because we were aligned, the Sun would shine upon the Earth and cast a shadow on the Moon, hence a lunar eclipse.

That was a wild thing to see tonight. I was worried it would be too cloudy or dick buildings would get in the way, but nope. I saw it when it started and then when it was almost fully covered and then when it had "reappeared". Neat stuff.

The other night I watched Dirty Jobs and Mike Rowe was at the Kennedy Space Center cleaning the crawler. Mike Rowe + Space = Ultimate Super-Gasm. It was hard to contain myself. A cold shower and a cigarette were calling my name. Unfortunately I was in little old Eastchester and smoking was not an option. I was suffering on Saturday because I was at Andrea, David, Raven, Dakota & Lucian's place of residence for Dakota & Lucian's 2nd Birthday (where I also suffered from a panic-attack... ps I've been okay since then w00t!) and everybody in David's family (including David) smoke. They kept leaving for a schmoke and all I could do was breathe in the zephyr they brought back in with them that carried traces of tobacco and nicotine. As soon as I got home I bolted out and bought a pack of Marlboro Menthol Lights at the second gas station I saw. I didn't get them at the first because they got busted for selling to minors and now they cleaned out their cabinets and put signs all over that say "we have no cigarettes or tobacco products". How depressing. I walked in, looked at the guy and said "You got nothing? NOTHING?!?" He nodded and I stormed out. I was an angry bitch who needed her fix. I then picked up Tess Watson and enjoyed two of them in the span of three minutes, and they were damn good. Speaking of... I'm gonna go do that now, then take a nap, and get up in 4.5 hours to go to PHYSICS! But hey the sooner I get this stuff done, the sooner I get to go to UMass YAY!!

Things To Do: "What Not How" (god that comes in handy so much. see why I love that show?!?)

• Physics 9:30 - 10:45
• Buy Planet Of The Blind
• Write a 2nd ACE Draft & Read book.
  
• ACE 2:00 - 3:15
• Inquires meeting @ Starbucks 4:00 - 5:40
• ACE meeting @ Bobst 6:50
• Home? --> UMass

God. What  a shitty day I have planned out for me. It's now 4:04am. It took me 2 hours to write this entry because I was distracted by Tony & The Plague.

Things I will write about later on in life... aka in a later post...

• During hard times, Geddy Lee resorts to playing bar mitzvahs, including Bob Ross' in the late 70s.
• Geddy lee caused the holocaust... He was so ugly.
• Friday June 25, 2004 : How the Holocaust rocked Rush front man Geddy Lee
• tony on anne the hall monitor... is she downsed up?
• Other writer's block questions.
• More dreams? (If they happen.)

These are mostly because of Tony Sollecito distracting me and saying half these ridiculous things. I'll explain them all later.

P.S.- Try explaining Pretty In Pink to your best friend with whom you've been living in a similar situation with. Haha, it's not that easy and just as awkward as it sounds. God. Now I want to watch it. Damn you nostalgic emoticon!

    $18.86... My total. I pay with a 50 just to break it. I have time to kill before my train leaves. I already missed one. The reason I missed the last one is because all the machines in the Union Square subway station were only taking cash... Even the  credit / debit ones... Go figure. And I was not about to buy a $50 Metrocard. Now Way. No way Baby. I had to buy all my bullshit in Hudson News of Grand Central. The heaven of tourists and teenagers wondering around Grand Central who are trying to kill time before their train leave. I look at my pile of items. It makes me wonder what weird combinations of magazines and food other people buy.. In my pile are three magazines and three food items. A "Scientific American Mind" The "Why We Kiss" issue, a "Psychology Today" and a "Cosmopolitan" with the word "Va-jay-jay" written in big bold letters on the cover. This has to be the most random array of magazines that I'm purchasing. It's my necessary collection of monthly periodicals. I'm the scientist who wants to know how the mind works but would also like to know 21 Naughty Sex Tips". I grab my magazines, my two packs of Cheese Nips and my 20oz of Coke and make a beeline for track 29. The 3:55 Harlem express to North White Plains is waiting for me. I need a 4 or 6 seat bench so I can put my feet up. It's a compulsion.
    "Is this train going to Hartsdale?" I hear a voice similar to that of Irene Meyers, one of my Camper's moms. She comes down to the 4 seater adjacent to me and asks me too. "Does this train stop at Hartsdale?" I try to be polite.
    "It should. It's first stop is Crestwood and the last is North White Plains. So, Crestwood, Scarsdale, Hartsdale, White Plains and North White Plains.Sp I'm guessing it would."
    "Okay great." She's so paranoid. She keeps talking to her daughter about how she should shit in the forward facing seat so she doesn't get sick and how she hopes they're on the right train. I just sit quietly and eat my snack.
    An older man seats himself diagonal from me. She asks him.
    "Do you know if this train is stopping at Hartsdale?" He's clever.
    "It better be, That's where I'm getting off." I look up at him for the first time. He's not the usual "Corporate America" creep that I usually get stuck with. He's got a little stripped tie on and is reading a book. He looks like he'll go home to a small fragile woman who will have his chicken patty waiting for him. The conductor takes my ticket and I take a sip of my Coke. The bottle top is weird. It's still red and mad of plastic, but there are larger ridges in it. It looks like the top of a beer bottle except it's a thick plastic instead of a thin metal and twists off instead of having to be bent off.
    I'm in the bowels of GCT now, slowly gliding across the miles of what feels like frictionless steel. In the tunnel, it always feels frictionless. You'd never know you were moving without the occasional light you pass or the clang that is heard when you travel over a seem. The Metro North rides get shorter and less exciting with age. It used to take 40 minutes to get to the city and the ride was filled with the singing  of guilty pleasures and the occasional slice of Crestwood pizza. Now it still takes 40 minutes but I can only manage to catch a couple of depressing songs before I have to get off again. Food isn't such a priority anymore. It's usually skipped because I always need to buy a train ticket and I probably only have three minutes before the train comes. God, can't a girl even get a cigarette in before the ride? Guess not. I never  quite understood why every Metro North train has to stop at Harlem - 125th Street. Even if I was told that Crestwood was the first stop.
    I always notice Harlem. Melrose, Fordham, Botanical Gardens, Mt. Vernon West and such usually get lost because I'm too busy worrying  about what situation in my life the song I'm currently listening to pertains to. (Or you know, I'm learning some dirty sex tips...)
    I'm in the Bronx now-- a I'm lost in an unfamiliar place. I don't know it at all. I know how to get to the Bronx Zoo, Fordham Prep and McDonald's via Metro North but that's about it. I can't wait to go to the Zoo again. It needs to be spring-- now. The delicate transition from the city to Suburbia is mesmerizing. Twenty miles brings you into a very different world. I encompass both world. I'm a small town girl with big dreams who dares to cross when the light is green and know her way around the labyrinth of the transit system. They're my alter egos. I can be known in Eastchester or be a nameless face in a sea of Jane and John Does. I love it.
    I'm at the Crestwood station. I hope that lady and her kid make it to Hartsdale.

So Annamaria tried to convince me that Mike Rowe is an old grandpa who sucks at singing the National Anthem. Well I don't care because Sean Penn is a dirty old pedophile who yells about his daughter in Annamaria's favorite porno titled Mystic River. I also told her that when she sings the National Anthem she sounds like a dying pig. I don't care if she's never sang it out loud, I can still imagine her singing it... As a dying pig. Sean Penn looks like he has down syndrome and several other mental retardation diseases and looks like death. He's got a huge beak and hair that looks like cotton balls that have been dipped in sewage and have been placed atop his head. Mike Rowe however is a fine wine. He gets better with age, since his QVC days he's gained a little more weight [so he's not such a twig anymore] and has developed his oh so adorable canyons in his face-- aka his wrinkles. He's a fine looking older man with his gorgeous light eyes that are absolutely stunning. Sean Penn is an ego maniac, with some talent -- courtesy of Jess Flora... and is not her type. Well he sure isn't mine either. He's a disgusting rat who looks like he's been beaten with an ugly stick countless times. He should be beaten with the stick a few more times, you know maybe crack his skull open and let his cranial fluids leak out onto the floor until he has terminated. What a fugly dude... Now that I think about it... He kind of looks like Geddy Lee. GROSS!! He's a dirty old man pirate who should go snort some more crack and end up on celebrity rehab, where he will enter a committed homosexual relationship with Jeff Conway. No more hickeys from Kenickie for the ladies... They'll all be reserved for Sean's ugly face and body. Jeff will probably have a seizure while producing one but Sean won't mind, that turns him on.

When you think hot... Do you picture this?




Nice veins and moobs buddy... Now on to the real hottie.

I'll finish this later... I gotta go to class.

ok I'm BAAACk...

I'll even post a terrible pic of Mike just to show that even in bad pictures, he's still hot!



Sorry, it's kinda big. What a lovely hairy chest...

He's got that big balled walk... That slight swagger in his step that just hint that you know he's packing a rocket in his pants... I wish i could find the picture with his bulge in it... He's standing in the middle of the street with nothing but white boxers on. HOT! Sure he's got an old face but he's got beautiful eyes and a cute manly voice and [from what I've gathered from the show...] a great personality. He swears like a sailor and has his mind in the gutter. Wow sounds like me.

Apparently NYC events for him are pending aka meet and greets and all that bullshit, so you know as soon as I hear of them I will go and camp outside until he comes. SO GOOD!

Moral of the story: Sean Penn is a dirty old gross ugly retard and Mike Rowe is a hot older opera-singing man.

I think I'm going dumb... I saw a lady walking into an apartment building with three dogs and I imagined her saying to them "C'mon little monkeys!!" I quickly shook my head and was like what the fuck did I just say? Wow. Nice Daynes. Nice.

Harumph... Valentine's Day is tomorrow, let's see what's happens with this shit show.